A Letter to All Concerned Parties*

*this letter is not directed to the readers of this blog, it is written in general- if you read this blog then ignore it, I am just frustrated and wanted to blow off some steam, and what better way to do that than venting my frustrations all over the internet.

Several years ago one of my all time favorite BYU professors introduced me to the concept of the “eternal triangle”. Because I attend BYU, topics like religion, child rearing, and celestial marriage came up on a daily basis, so the introduction of the “eternal triangle” into a women’s health lecture wasn’t that unusual, the concept presented wasn’t that unusual either, I just had never heard someone speak so adamantly about it (nor had I seen then hand motions that go with it.). Needless to say the eternal triangle is something that has stuck with me these last few years and something that Brian and I have tried to incorporate into our marriage.

 What is the eternal triangle you ask- it is a decision making model where all decisions are made between you, your spouse, and your heavenly father- it is not an eternal circle, square, diamond, pentagon, or octagon- it is a triangle- meaning there are three individuals involved in the decision making process-THREE, not four, not five.

Why am I writing about this? Well it turns out that I turned 23 a few months ago, it also turns out I celebrated my 3^rd anniversary a little more than a month ago, I graduated from college a little over a year ago, Brian graduated from college a few months ago, he has a full time job with a good salary and benefits beginning in a few months, we are looking (seriously) into purchasing our first home, and I will graduate with my Masters in about 6 months. What does all of this mean… it means that people are starting to ask us, on what I can only describe as an hourly basis, when we are going to start have children. This makes me want to kick someone. This is our decision (if you are reading this blog than you haven’t been asking us so I am NOT talking about you), stop asking, we will have children when we are ready, when it is best for our family, and when we (the eternal triangle) feel it is best. While you (not you in particular or any reader of this blog I am just venting) may have a lifetime of experience, and may think that we are waiting too long and missing out on opportunities you don’t have all the information- not being a member of the eternal triangle- so stop. When you are the one giving birth to the child, paying for the child, taking care of them, and let’s face it when you are the parent, you get to make that decision, and your opinion matters- unfortunately for you, you are none of those things in this particular situation, stop asking me, when we decide to have children we will be more than happy to inform you (and yes we will eventually have children), until then sit tight and stop asking.