A Year in Review

I turned 24 this week, and as is customary around my birthday, I have been reflecting. This has been a busy year for me. I have moved more times than I liked, left behind a life that I loved for something new and better, finished college for the second time, welcomed myself to the reality of a husband with a career, searched for a job (and then searched some more), sent my brother on a mission, welcomed another one home, finished my graduate project, and stumbled into the adult world. While hectic and challenging, this year has brought so many blessings into our lives. As I sit on this side of 24 I have to say, life is good!

Graduation!

Today was graduation, go cohort 7! More pictures to come (good pictures not lovely ones like this)

Livin' on the Edge...

I am not a big risk taker. I married a future accountant, now an actual accountant who LOVES rules, I majored in something that would eventually lead to a real job (art history was my rebellious stage), I drive the speed limit (and not over), I dont wear crazy patterns, I stick to foods I can pronounce, I dont ski, bungee jump, or even travel much- I am not a risk taker. But there is one risk I cannot keep away from- Beto's. Those of you that havent lived in Utah, or that just havent experienced this hidden treasure are missing something big. Beto's is a junky mexican restaurant (not even sure that term applies here) located in provo (and other cities along the Wasatch front). Beto's is one of the very few risks I am willing to take. I think you need a bit of background, Beto's is one of those places that you could quite literally die from eating at. Every once in awhile it is shut down by the health department, but without fail it reopens and continues the cycle. Sometimes the name changes, but the menu doesnt, the employees don't, and the sanitation practices definitely dont. Beto's (or Mi Rancheritos as it was named the last time I was there) is cheap, it is open 24 hours a day, and it is frequented by students. I think of it as a game of Russian roulette- by eating there you are taking a huge risk, you might get food poisoning or it might be delicious- but you never quite know what you are going to get. I love the suspense- I know I am strange. The drive thru line during mid terms and finals is ALWAYS long, especially around 11pm. The burritos are huge- if you eat one for breakfast (they have breakfast burritos) it is unlikely that you will need to eat for the next 24 hours- it is a brick. There is something about Beto's that warms my heart. My favorite thing to get there is the 5 rolled tacos with guacamole- to be fair these are actually just corn tortillas with guacamole and sour cream on them (for some reason there is never any filling), and they arent even great (you read about the missing filling) but I LOVE them. I have been craving Beto's for months- I just cannot get enough, and tonight I decided to break down and make it myself- havent made it yet so I cant report, but I have a feeling my version wont measure up, there is no risk for a food borne illness, no greasy white paper sack, no macey's parking lot and sonic drink to go with it- just food cooked in a clean kitchen served on plates... oh Beto's what will I do without you!

*if you havent tried it you need to go- this place isnt for the faint hearted, seriously you could get violently ill but it is worth it

** the food isnt always fabulous, it is the risk that is worth it... maybe i need to take other risks, maybe i should drive 46 instead of 45 and then i will be done with my Beto's obsession...

dressing for success

Have you ever met someone that always looks cute? You know the person I am referring to, they always look very well put together, matching, clothes fit correctly, and they have cute accessories. I am by no stretch of the imagination one of those people. I am a faded jeans and free t shirt with flip flops sort of person, anything beyond a hoodie isn’t really my cup of tea. Sure, I do attempt to get it together sometimes, and I have been known to on occasion wear something that requires ironing, or hanging up, or care beyond leaving it in the dryer until I will myself to fold the laundry (which only happens when either Brian or I run out of clean clothes), but if left to my own devices my wardrobe would consist of pjs stolen from brian, men’s gym shorts, jeans that are so old I didn’t even live in this time zone when I purchased them, and free t shirts I got while working at the BYU Bookstore. We can ramble down this road for quite awhile but let me rope you back in and tell you why I am really writing. As previously mentioned I got a job, not just any job, a real life professional out of college job, now it is time to reevaluate the homeless person look I have cultivated for so long. In most of my previous postions the people I have worked with have been quite a bit older than I am… for example in my current job, the fact that I have my natural hair color makes me quite stylish, but at my new job that isn’t the case. This is a young company, not government, marketing… they dress up. I have posted about this before, but now I really need to know, how do people do this? How do you go into a store and decide that this and this look good together, and they look even better paired with this necklace, etc? I am guessing comfort and pockets aren’t the biggest concerns- they are when I usually buy clothes (they have to have pockets for my chapstick), what do I do? How do you know what is “in”? Hm… I need some ideas… I feel like a trip to the freshman dorms might give me some insight into this, they accessorize every day. Even better than that does someone want to go shopping for me, I am not the biggest fan of it, I don’t even know what looks are “flattering” (just typing the word annoys me), and I am too indecisive. I need someone to come and take charge, buy the clothes and say too bad this is what looks good, anyone up for the job?

Attitude Adjustment

I have spent the last few weeks in desperate need of an attitude adjustment. Just in case you are scratching your head wondering what in the heck and "attitude adjustment" is let me explain- this is something my mom said daily when i was a teenager, basically it means you need to get over yourself. So back to the story. So for the last few weeks I have needed to get over myself, and by get over myself I mean, I needed to get up and move on with my life instead of wishing that things were going differently. I have been searching for a job... for a long time with limited success... and this was frustrating to say the least. I was irritated, I had been to school for so long, paid my dues, and thought I had a skill to offer the world. Turns out the current job market didnt agree with me, which is... understandable, but no less frustrating. This lovely little adventure has been going on since last fall, so by March I was done, sick of it, and more than a little discouraged. I think my perspective was more than a little warped because Brian got his job over a year before he graduated, in some parallel universe I thought it might be as easy.

As March wound on I was starting to dread april. April meant graduation and a trip back to utah. While I was excited to graduate it also made me feel sick. I was graduating with a Masters and no job, not just no job but no real viable prospects. I had chosen not to apply to additional schooling so that wasn’t even an option, for lack of a better phrase I was up a creek without a paddle. By this point I was looking for a reason to avoid graduation, to avoud my peers, and avoid explaining to friends why I didn’t have a job. To be realistic no one cares whether or not I got a job but I did. I thought going back without one made me a “loser”, just a “sucky loser”, somewhere along the way my internal vocabulary reverted back to the 6^th grade. By this point I really needed to get over myself and realize that life is good. I have a wonderful husband, a house, we have reliable transportation ( regardless of what Just Brakes says, but that is another post), Brian has a wonderful job, and well to be fair we live a pretty charmed life, but for some reason that wasn’t good enough in those moments. I thought that none of this measured up, why I am not sure, but this is like those moments when 16 year old girls look at their peers and instead of seeing smart beautiful women they see competition and they see themselves as the losers rather than the reality that they, like their peers, are smart, talented, and beautiful.

So by this point I was frustrated, and I decided to go and see my grandma. Well actually I needed her to show me how to sew darts into a dress but that is besides the point. While she was teaching me/doing it for me we chatted about this. Basically she said I needed to get over myself, which is true. She reminded me that while I didn’t have a job I did have so many other things going for me, and choosing to dwell on one of the few things that wasn’t going my way really was taking me away from enjoying what we do have. I left feeling better, still not thrill but more grateful, and less hard on myself. I drove home- all the way across dallas so it took a bit, and by the time I got there I had a plan, something I was going to do to turn my life back into what I wanted, a path, and even more a path to stop this horrible round of unproductive comparison. I was pumped by the time I got back out to lavon, and then I got a phone call. I got a job… I interviewed last week, left feeling unsure, but I got a job. I signed the contract and as of April 26^th my career is beginning. Now I have what I wanted, but I hope that I can keep things in perspective, there are some things that are more important than others, this while it seemed important, wasn’t really, worrying didn’t help, things worked out, and the comparison didn’t add anything to my life or the lives of those around me. So on that thrilling note I am back on track, I am excited to go to utah, and I am going to be TICKED if American decides to strike between now and then, cross your fingers nothing happens!

No more searching...

After months of searching and sending out what can only be described as a mountain of resumes I am happy to report that I found a job. Yes you read that correctly, a paying job (I know what a novel concept for me). It isnt at Walmart, Banana Republic, Tom Thumb or as an administrative assistant. It is a real honest to goodness paying career job. As of the end of the month I will be working with a company called ReachLocal as a Campaign Performance Analyst- think program evaluation. More details to come but I have a job (too bad you can't hear the song I made up via this blog).

Confusing Comparison

I recently heard the aims of the American "Tea Party" movement compared with the Republic of Gilead as described by Margaret Atwood in A Handmaid's Tale. I was confused by this reference and for the last few days have tried to figure out why in the world this comparison was made, after a few days I still have no idea what this commentator was thinking.

In order to understand my confusion you first need to know a bit about the novel. A Handmaid's Tale is described as a work of "speculative fiction". It is set in a futuristic country set somewhere within the borders of the United States. Due to a nuclear meltdown, disease outbreaks, and terrorism the United States was destroyed and replaced by this particular republic. Additionally, the population as a whole suffers from widespread infertility- hence the name of the book. I read this book in early high school, and then again in college so I am a bit familiar with the plot, main themes, and even the tone of the book, but I am still confused. The futuristic world described by Atwood doesnt touch on the main tenants of the tea party movement.

I cant say whether or not I agree with the tea party movement, but at the same time I have yet to make up my mind I realize this comparison is dangerous and can lead to individuals discrediting the ideas explored. A Handmaid's Tale is a cautionary work of fiction not an exposé on current political movements...

I am still annoyed by the comparison. I need someone to explain it to me... any ideas?

Just in case you havent read the novel, below is a link to the wikipedia article (yes not scientific but it is a start).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Handmaid%27s_Tale